The Weekend that Was

smallest step

So I did it! I made it through the Vegas weekend…I survived the travel, the memories, and a little bit of heartache. I had melancholy moments, but I also had laughter, sunshine, and joy. I felt Gregger around me, pushing me, encouraging me. He would hate some of the things I did, the way I traveled, but it sort of made me laugh. For the first time in a long time, I was making my own choices. Believe me, I would be much happier with his choices or our choices, but making my choices at this point did feel pretty good. They were silly dumb things, but that’s okay. They were still my choices and I was okay with them.

It took me a long time to be okay with my choices. That probably sounds a bit crazy, but we were young babes when we married. I went from nesting under my parent’s “wing” to living with Gregger. From the beginning he took care of me. I never really knew what it meant to take care of myself. I only knew what it was to be “taken care of” by someone else. So I let him take care of me. I let him make the decisions, the choices, for a long time, until I realized I wanted a voice too. Things slowly changed in our marriage and we grew to make choices together, but early on, I barely bought a tube of mascara without his permission. I just didn’t know any better.  think positively

While reinventing myself this weekend, I relived so many memories. I realized how we grew as individuals as well as together; how our journey gave me the strength to be here today. Suzy and I visited all of “our” favorite spots, but I got better as the days went on. We talked about the past, the present, and the future. My sis was my greatest support and I think I was able to unload a lot of “baggage,”  maybe coming home a little bit lighter.

Nothing extreme, nothing crazy, but I was out in the world, just me. If you asked me five years ago if I could do this, I would have said, “Hell NO!” I would have pictured myself buried in the comfort of my home, secure with my computer and a few shows on TV. I play the role of recluse much better than that of “bar girl.” But for a few short days it was fun to be someone and something else. I could play, I could pretend, and I then I could come back and face reality all over again. I’m ready for the newest challenges…and there are new ones every day.  I never know what will hit me next. I appreciate the reprieve, the fun, and the fancy. Until next time…


Mikki Eveloff

I am certainly no princess, but I did marry my Prince Charming. We had the once upon a time and the “almost” happily ever after until August 30th, 2014 when my Prince Gregger died tragically on the beach in Maui. I believe in fairytales. I believe in fate. I believe that “everything happens for a reason.” We planned a lifetime together…75 years to be exact. Someone or something changed our plans and gave us a new “ever after.” So here I am. I am still a wife, but now they call me a widow. I am a mom and grandma…three children, two in-laws, and two grandchildren. Life has changed and it’s time to move forward. It doesn’t stop, it keeps on going, so I do too. It’s my choice. Be happy, be grateful. It’s the only choice. I have a treasure trove of memories to’s how I keep the happily ever after alive. A True Love Fairytale is 40 years of memories…it’s the essence of our happily ever after. It’s the imperfections of our perfect marriage. And it’s what makes today beautiful.

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