Life is a tapestry woven with joy and sorrow. I never imagined my life to be as it is. My life was nearly perfect. On the trajectory to lifelong togetherness. Living our best lives. Together. But fairytales don’t always end with the “happily ever after.” Mine did not. So, here I am. Still figuring it out. 9 years later.
Life continues its relentless march forward. I “do” life. Fall into the mundane rhythm. Yet, the shadow of grief is ever present. Not all encompassing. But there. Time is a complex companion. It is not a healer. Yet it transforms. Changes the way grief affects me. I can’t wave a magic wand. Make “it” disappear. My sorrow has been altered. Redefined. Mellowed. Softened. Moments of heartache.
My journey has been a tumultuous one. Peaks and valleys. Acceptance and surrender. Longing and despair. The beginning. Raw pain. Overpowering, engulfing every aspect of my life. An all-encompassing force, like a fierce storm raging within my soul. The world seemed colorless. Life lost its meaning without Greg beside me. Every day an endless struggle. Memories brought meaning and solace. Cherishing our treasured love, laughter, tears, joy, and challenges, softened my sorrow.
How have I learned to live forward? Redefine my grief? Acceptance. Acceptance that there is no “cure” for grief. Acceptance that grief does not go away. Acceptance that grief exists because we shared a beautiful love. Acceptance that it’s okay to not be okay. Acceptance of a normalcy in my life. A new rhythm. I know Greg will no longer walk through the door. His voice an echo in my mind.
My journey is one of resilience. Strength. Strength that I never knew existed. Strength borne out of necessity to move forward. My journey continues. There is no end. No choice. No option. I am here. Alive. And living. I need to live.
Throughout my journey my one beacon of hope was The Power of the Pen. Writing. In the beginning, I wrote for me. To keep Greg alive. But the stories ran out. What could I say? Did anyone care? Now. I’ve discovered hope. Again. “Embracing Ink..A Journey of Moving On and Navigating Grief” is a tale of resilience. Growth. Discovery. As I expose my personal navigation through grief, I hope to offer solace and understanding to anyone treading the same path. We can get here together. One breath. One moment. One step. At a time.
I realize it’s okay to be happy. Laugh. Live. I understand the love that Greg and I shared will forever be a part of me. It CAN coexist with pain of loss. I embrace my reality. Grief is not a sign of weakness. It is a testament to my love.
Grief is not a linear process. There’s no fixed end date. It’s a lifelong journey. A path I continue to walk with courage. Grace. Resilience. My love for Greg is my guiding light, illuminating the way forward even as I carry the weight of the past. I know my life will never be the same again. I can accept the change. Grief has become a gentle companion. It is an integral part of who I’ve become, coexisting with happiness and hope. As I move forward I know that Greg’s memory will forever be a cherished presence in my heart.