I struggled with the decision to write again. Some days I felt ready to blurt out, “Hello world, here I am. Let me tell you my story. My journey.” But others, I cowered behind the safety of the walls. No hurt. No pain. No tears. I was alive. But was I living? I needed to feel. Breathe. Let go. Of fear. Fear of exposure. Fear of being alone. Fear of facing the truth. My feelings. The good. The bad. The truth. It’s been almost 3 years since Gregger left this earth. Some things have changed. Others not. What hasn’t changed? Missing Gregger. Loving him. Holding him in my heart. That’s forever. What has changed? Me. I’m living. Breathing. Smiling. Laughing. I have new friends. Earth Angels. These are the things I want to write about. The changes. The lessons. The tides. The waves. And how I ride them each and every day. Maybe it will resonate with another soul. I don’t know. Each and every day is brand new. A chance for a new beginning. Fresh start. So here we go. My life lessons. My Chapter 2. On my way to a new/different “happily ever after.” This is my journey…
Set aside “grief time.” Let it be okay. It’s not a bad thing. It’s a time to “let out the love you want to give but can’t.” It’s filling those empty little holes in your heart one piece at a time. Mine is the morning drive to “work out.” Not every day. But some days. It just happens. I don’t know when. It just “hits.” No warning. Just a beat of my heart. And I know. I lose myself in the music. Tears stream down my cheeks. Or I smile, sing along, and look to clouds. But it’s my time. And then it’s over. I step out of my car. And enter my “happy place.” I see my Earth Angels. My heart smiles. And joy fills my soul. I’ve had my time. I’m okay. And I know that all is right with the world.
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