Late Blooming Lessons – Life’s Second Chapter
“There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one.”
Lesson #7: Love Without Strings – The Mother I Choose To Be
It was the “job” I’d waited for all my life. When people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always said, “A mom.” It was my dream job.
Little did I know, it wouldn’t be all giggles and diapers. It was a full-time job—one that doesn’t come with vacation days or a clear manual—and it lasts a lifetime. And as my children grew, so did I. My role constantly shifted. Nurturer. Guide. Protector. Counselor. Cheerleader. And continues to evolve still.
I was 25 when I became a mother for the first time. I was determined to do everything “right.” I thought if I tried hard enough, I could be the perfect mom. But perfection doesn’t exist—at least not in real life. Maybe in storybooks or fairy tales. But not in the messy. Beautiful. Exhausting. Soul-stretching reality of motherhood.
What I’ve learned is this: We make mistakes. We stumble. We try again. We do the best we can with what we know. And that has to be enough.
Motherhood, for me, has been an ever-evolving role—shaped by patience. Humility. Growth. And, above all, LOVE. One of the most important decisions I ever made was to love unconditionally. Not just when things were going well, but especially when they weren’t. That meant accepting and loving my children for who they are—not for what they do, how they perform, or what they become. LOVE. No strings attached. They never had to earn it. Despite the missteps. Messy moments. Or challenges. My love has remained steadfast. And unwavering.
Did I always get it right? ABSOLUTELY. NOT. But I tried. I’m still trying. Because unconditional love is what makes them feel safe. Fully loved. Protected.
Another promise I made to myself as a mother was to truly listen.
Not just to the words spoken. But to the emotions behind them. I wanted my children to feel heard. To know their voices matter. Because listening isn’t just about offering a response. It’s about connection. It’s about seeing them clearly, in everything that makes them who they are. I want them to feel safe, calling me on the joyful days. The hard days.The quiet “nothing” days. Whether they need to laugh. Cry. Vent. Or simply be. I’ll be here. To listen. ALWAYS.
Now, as the mother of adult children (with families of their own), I often find myself reflecting on the past—wishing I could go back and do some things differently. More presence. More patience. More self-awareness. But I can’t go back. I can only choose to be better now.
I will show up.
I will listen.
I will accept. Without judgment.
Simply, I will be.
Be there to support. To understand. To love. Always love. That will never change.
The greatest gift I could ever give my kids is to love myself loudly and accept myself wholly. Not waiting until I lose (or gain) the last few pounds… not waiting to smooth out the wrinkles. The lines. Or—as my granddaughter calls them—my zebra stripes. But to embrace myself, as is, as is. To show up even when I’m exhausted. Sick. Overstimulated. Or emotionally drained. To keep pouring, even when my own cup is nearly empty. Because that’s what love does.
And to every mom in survival mode right now—please know this:
You are doing an incredible job. This is not easy. But you are not alone.
💛 The Gifts Moms Really Want (That Don’t Cost a Thing)
- A long, meaningful hug
- A genuine “thank you”
- Time together, undistracted
- A moment to rest or recharge
- Being noticed for holding it together when it felt like things were falling apart
- A few kind words: “You’re doing great. I see you.”
- A simple “I love you” for no reason at all
- Recognition not for what we do, but for who we are
- A reminder that we’re enough, just as we are
These are the gifts that matter most.
In the end, what I wanted most was simple:
For my kids to grow into confident. Kind. Loving. And happy people. I wanted them to always know they could come home—to a safe place of comfort and care, where they’re always welcome. Whether they needed encouragement. Stillness. Or just a long hug. I wanted them to know they’d never have to earn my love.
Because that’s the goal:
That they walk through this world knowing they are deeply. Unconditionally. Always loved.
To all the beautiful moms who have loved. Laughed. Cried. Endured. And grown through every season of motherhood.
You are seen. You are needed. You are the heart of it all.
And you are doing the most important job in the world.