“Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.”
No bondage, no domination, no submission, just the subdued blending of black and white into the compromising shades of gray. Gregger was MY perfect. While I consider our love story one filled with love and passion, we were no Christian and Ana… no contracts, just vows and commitments, no S & M, just support and mindfulness.
My 40 Shades of Gray is something that comes with the maturity of wedded bliss…it’s learning to soften the lines between his black and my white (or my black and his white), conforming to the perfect shades of gray. Practice makes perfect (well almost), and practice we did…so many situations, so many encounters, requiring FLC…Flexibility, Listening, Communication. From parenting issues to how to load a dishwasher or which way the toilet paper rolls and everything in between, our grays changed from dark to light, from light to dark. Sometimes it was the petty things and other times it was the gargantuan elephant in the room, but at the end of the day, the blending of shades required the fundamental principles that make any team work, or at least OUR team.
He was the party guy…I was the stay at home girl.
He was a sports fanatic…I loved reality and drama.
He was the daredevil…I was the timid, reluctant one.
He was suits, sportcoats, and savvy…I was sweats, a little stylishly chic.
He was hard-core Jamesons…I was sip-it-slow Pinot.
He was spoil ’em with boundaries…I was overindulge.
He was a saver…I was spend, spend, spend.
He was pragmatic…I was quixotic.
He washed and loaded…I wiped and straightened.
He retreated…I shouted.
We blended just fine over the past 40 years. We learned life is never perfect…love is never perfect…and, certainly marriage is never perfect. But, working together to achieve the perfect shade of gray, well…that’s what made it PERFECT every day. That’s what made it all worthwhile.