Dear 19-year-old Mikki,
After many years of building your family, business, and lives together, you and hubby start reclaiming your lives. Your kids will move on. They will move away. Across the U.S. One on the east coast. One on the west coast. One stays put. It won’t always be easy. You’ll want to visit. They’ll be busy. You’ll have grandkids. You won’t get to see them as often as you’d like. Not the fairy tale you dreamed about. They have their own agenda. You wish things could be different. But they aren’t. Someday. You will wait. But your heart will hurt. Be patient. “All things are difficult before they become easy.” They may never become easy, but they will become better. Once again, it’s about expectations. None. So whatever happens, is good. Sometimes great.
You will turn your focus on your hubby. He is flourishing in the world. You are so proud of him. His accomplishments. His passion. You will stand by him. Support him. It’s a challenge at times. You want him to choose you. Everytime. He is so torn. He wants to spend time with you. But the business is booming. He knows he needs to be there. He doesn’t know how to let go. You can’t push him. He has to figure it out himself. But you figure it out. You will learn that support is mutual. The more you give, the more you get. It really works both ways.
You will find yourself in yoga. You become more present. More grateful. You recognize the blessings. Focus on the positive. Let go of what you can’t control. Let go of fear. You break down walls. Your relationships become stronger. Deeper. With family. Friends. And most of all, hubby. Priorities change. You love nice things. But you realize “things” don’t bring happiness. You finally realize it’s not, “once you do or get this, things will be perfect.” It’s living in the moment. It’s recognizing what’s in front of you. That’s when you discover peace. Happiness. And life is preparing you. You just don’t know it yet.
Your little girl is going to get married. To one great guy. You will be ecstatic after waiting seven long years. It is going to be one of the most joyous occasions of your life. For so many reasons. A fairy tale from beginning to end. You will cherish every second you spend planning together. And the celebration will be overflowing with love, joy, family, and friends. Lots and lots of family and friends. So grateful. A weekend blending two families into one. Another blessing. Not just for the moment, but for years to come.
You will travel more with hubby. And then you will choose not to. Some of these choices will be because you shy away from the social situations. That’s okay. But you will look back one day and wish you had made different choices. Don’t look back. Be okay with the choices you made. Those were the best choices for you at the time. You need to accept that. You were supporting him. You were pushing him to be better. But being uncomfortable was not part of the deal. Your choices were okay. He missed you. You missed him. And when you came back together, things were better than ever.
Life is going to throw you a major curveball. Something you clearly don’t see coming. After a near perfect year, you will be knocked out. Dealbreaker. It’s a setup. Allowing you to deal with adversity. Become stronger. Back surgery. Nerve damage. In and out of hospitals. Not sure if you’ll ever be the same. Ever be able to walk right again. Sit. Move. But somehow you deal. You realize it could be so much worse. Your life drastically changes. But you see the blessing. More time with hubby. He’s always by your side. Holding your hand. Comforting. More time with friends. You start working at the store. You learn new things. You make the most of a bad situation. And, as with all things in life, there is a reason. God is preparing you. You are learning things you never knew. Because in a few months, you will HAVE to know. You just don’t know it yet.
You will have some incredible trips together. All in the course of one year. Sweden. Paris. New York. Mexico. San Diego. Boston. St. Louis. And one more. Your dream trip. A family trip. Cherish those moments. Every. Single. One of them. They may be the best moments you will ever have together. Hold on tight. You will know why soon enough.
To be continued…